We all have expectations.
Sometimes they’re quiet—an unspoken hope.
Sometimes they’re heavy—loaded with years of conditioning.

And whether they’re about others or ourselves, expectations often pull us out of the present and into disappointment.

The Trap of Expecting Others to Meet Our Needs

It sounds like:

  • “They should’ve known better.”

  • “Why didn’t they follow through?”

  • “I thought they cared more than this.”

And it feels like:

  • Resentment

  • Letdown

  • Powerlessness

But here’s the truth: When we place expectations on others without consent, we hand over our power and set everyone up for failure.

Even when our intentions are good—like hoping a friend continues healing or a partner reads our mind—we’re often reacting from past wounds or future fear… not present-time clarity.

Expectations become the unconscious rules we set for others to follow. And when they don’t?
We judge, withdraw, or spiral.

And Then There’s the Flip Side…

When others place their expectations on us, we can feel:

  • Pressured to perform

  • Afraid to disappoint

  • Guilty for having needs

It’s like we’re constantly auditioning for a role we never signed up for.
If you’ve ever felt responsible for someone else’s emotions, reactions, or peace… you’ve been carrying their expectations.

Ask yourself:

“Am I doing this because I want to, or because I think I should?”
“Whose voice is guiding this choice—mine, or theirs?”

So What’s the Alternative?

It’s not about having no expectations.
It’s about shifting from expectation to desire and communication.

Try this:

  • Instead of silently expecting someone to show up… ask for what you need.

  • Instead of waiting to be let down… check in on your assumptions.

  • Instead of assuming it’s your job to meet someone’s needs… pause and consider if you even want to.

We stay in our power when we own what we want and release the belief that someone else must deliver it for us to feel okay.

Want to explore this more?

Ask yourself:

  • What’s one expectation I’ve been holding that feels heavy or old?

  • Is this something I actually want—or just something I hope will fix something else?

  • How would I feel if I let that expectation go, just for today?

How can you release yourself from expectations today? 🌸